I guess it was just a matter of time before it happened... Saturday morning I woke up to breakfast in bed, a very pleasant and unexpected treat (one that, as a man, I would never ask for). As I was adjusting to better able myself to eat I looked down and saw this big red spot on my leg. I immediately shot right up and knew precisely what had happened.
"THAT'S A TICK BITE!" I screamed. Upon closer examination I saw that there was a dark spot in the middle of the red area, and in the middle of the darker spot, a nasty little bug, clinging on to me as if his, or more likely her, life depended on it, which as it turned out it did. With Stephanie practically in the next county by now (she didn't like seeing the sight of something eating her husband) I was pretty much on my own. Whilst I ran into the bathroom in search of some tweezers Stephanie slowly came to her senses and looked up on the Internet the proper procedure for removing the tick. As it turns out, they will not let go, no matter what, even if you burn them (which I didn't do, thanks the info my wife retrieved). So, I just got a good hold on it and slowly, and painfully, pulled it out. Point of interest, up to this point I felt no pain at all. I literally could not feel it at all, as if it wasn't even there! When I started pulling, however, it was somewhere in between slowly pulling out a head hair and pinching off a good piece of your own flesh. In short, it wasn't pleasant.
The tick is dead! We put it in a jar and headed out to the Medical Center. Big mistake! In retrospect I almost wish I had decided to live as a permanent host to what would have quickly become a precious member of the family, I'm sure. But with 63% of Green Lakes ticks testing positive for Lyme, we went on our way. We spent the better part of the next hour in the waiting room, then my name was called and we thought, "that wasn't too bad." WRONG! Then we spent about an hour and half (at least) just sitting in the exam room, waiting and waiting... eventually the Physician's Asst. (which, by the way, is not a doctor) shows up, looks at me for about thirteen seconds and says "oh I'll be right back with a prescription." All lies, maybe a half hour later she came back. Told us that they will send the tick out to see if it is the kind that can carry Lyme and gave me the script and we were on our way.
I'm glad that I have the drugs, and that the tick isn't attached to me anymore, but it sure seemed like a bad way to spend a Saturday.
Oh, and that breakfast in bed? I had to eat it in the car on the way, cold. Figures.
Thanks for reading!